....six more to go.
I asked Jon the other night if he ever thought about the possibility of me being pregnant. His response was, "More often than you think". So I asked, "Every five minutes, like me?" And he nearly died. It's true, though! Not a moment goes by where I don't "feel" something and think "hmm...is that a pregnancy sign, or just a side-effect of the progesterone I'm on (because the side effects of progesterone are very similar to early pregnancy signs). And I'll never know, I guess, but this two week wait is killing me!
I don't even think of all of this as a possible pregnancy...I refer to the procedure as "it". Let me explain that a bit better. I ask myself, "Do I feel like 'it' was a success" as opposed to "Is there a baby growing inside of me right now?" I think it helps me detach the emotional side of everything from the scientific side, so that I don't get too emotionally invested in something that only has a 40% chance of being successful. 40% is not very high.
When I get bored in the evenings (which should be never, because I have a lot of projects on the go right now...nothing fun...just my photo/blog album and some spending analysis spreadsheets to bring up to date), I google for forums/blogs where others who have gone through the same IVF or FET procedure share their day-to-day experiences/feelings and what their outcomes have been. My favourite is terobertson.blogspot.com (referred to me by Pauline when we started IVF 2.5 years ago). She's younger than me, already has two kids (one by IVF, and the other by FET), and shares a lot of the same feelings as I do. It's nice knowing that there are people out there that "get" it. You may think you do, but going through it is a completely different thing.
Anyways, there's my little vent session to clear my head. I've been having trouble falling asleep at night because my head is just swirling with thoughts, so maybe this will have helped. Falling asleep around midnight and then waking up at 5:20am to go to work is not fun.
After struggling with infertility for three years, we were blessed with the birth of Matthew and Kayla in March 2011 (by in vitro) , Nathan in October 2013 (by frozen embryo transfer), and Olivia in August 2015 (naturally!). We are loving every moment (well, almost!) of our lives as parents.
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